Ummapalm

Officially the fastest year, yet.

2012.

My favourite number from all the years. I remember looking forward to it and now it's already gone. Fuck.

I had expectations from 2012. A lot of great things were supposed to happen. But right now, when I'm trying to think back, it's all a blur. A complete blur. I really would like to believe that i have taken each day as it came this whole year. Not done too much, not thought too much. I just let it all be. Not have been the passionate professional i started out my work life with. Not have been the over thinking emotional person i have been all my life. Just a spectator. A watcher of the drama. Not a participant, not an actor.

So, i guess this year was like a little lunch break in the day of life. Actually, a long, leisurely type lunch. The ones you take on a sunny afternoon with a friend and not much work at hand. The few years before this one have been quite complicated, i remember. Internally and externally. I just read last year's year end post and realized i had decided to take it easy. Let my insides take a vacation. Let the heart be, let the mind be. Enough i have troubled them in my life. Like a bad boss.

So let's roll back the film of this year a little and see if we can spot any landmarks. There must some, at least.

Break
Goregaon
Blackberry film
Kerala
Ragasthan
The Juggler
The three musketeers
Ball of fun
Ragasthan call back
V for vendetta
Swimming!!!

Taking help from Facebook timeline now. Brb.

Help taken. Found nothing.

No landmarks. That's sort of disappointing. I expected more professionally. But personally I'm a lot more satisfied. I think that's not a loss. My insides feel rested. I think I'm ready to hit back now.

So after all the time i gave love to sort itself out, nothing went forward. And i made a decision.
Next, as decided at the end of the previous year, I made two trips happen. Wanted bigger ones, but they didn't take shape. But I'm happy that i made these happen. Looking back, they were so awesome in so many ways. I drew much closer to the three musketeers. I have always judged life in terms of friends gained. That way getting to know the the three boys and Ball of fun tops the list.

The rest of the year, i remember lots of parties. Lots of friday unwindings and crashings. Fun. As i had set out to achieve at the beginning of the year.

And most importantly, i think i gained what i set out 2012 with - Inner Peace. That was my theme and I'm glad i achieved it. Now that's an achievement. That's my landmark. And so fucking important. Everything else in life, all exterior achievements feel null without this. So ya I do have a landmark, a huge and extremely critical one for me. I have successfully crossed the tide. Now i can start looking up again.

So what do i expect from 2013.

13, umm, not the best feeling. Odd number too. So let's take it head on in that case.

I think a change in job will do me good now. Enough of the toil all the way to the end of the planet everyday. It's inhuman.. It's a waste of time. I think it's purpose is fulfilled. I can move on now.

I do want to  move out. Let's find ways to make that happen.

Liberation.

A good body. Yes yes, while it's still easier to keep one. And because you are young only once. Lots of looking great and in shape to happen.

Change job, get time and concentrate more on work. Do some KICKASS stuff.

Be fearless. Whoever it is. No shit. NO SHIT, WHATSOEVER.

That's it. It's really a blur. Hope for clearer times ahead. I have been in a hazy dream. I have rested. It's time to wake up. It's time to get things done.